This time next week I will be preparing to ask Hayley Williams to be my best friend.

Hello Blogspot.com

Well, it's been a nice weekend.

In a nutshell - my friend from Bournemouth came down, we went to a non-eventful firework display, went back to mine, was joined by a few others (who weren't allowed to be there - according to mother Lisa), spent the night dancing, practising what we would do upon Lisa's return, and had a few drinks in between :)

Oh and today I revised Chemistry for 3 hours, merrrghh :|

And now I am faced with homework, and more revision. I wish I wasn't ill during the exams the first time round :'(

On another note, I went Uxbridge yesterday and since considered becoming an elf in Santas grotto.

This would be a good idea for the following reasons:

• (Apparently) good pay
• Money for Christmas
• I get a cool suit?
• Jokes

However

• I'll probably get terrorised
• I hate kids
• I think Christmas is a bit gay, bit of a scrouge

But really, why do kids scream so much? Even when they laugh, it makes my ears ring.

Plus, how can people patronise kids like that? Lie to their faces about Father Christmas etc and generally be like "Oh Haaaiiiii!" etc..

I speak to my cats like that all the time, but children could  probably bitch about you in baby language or just stare and make you feel uncomfortable. But a cat would just be like meh and walk away and just maybe scratch you, and even then they still look cute and you can always kick them. 

Lolz, kick a kid.

Something new I guess. Can always apply..

I also found my appreciation for wrong jokes today, I was inspired by a friend at work who seems to know many;

"What's blue and black and doesn't like sex?

.. The little boy under my wardrobe"

Hahhhahahahahahah, made me feel a bit sick before I laughed though.

Wow, am I really considering a job working with children?

Mind The Gap;

iPodge

xxx